The world has enough decorated war heroes and enough talking media zeroes,

enough credentialed academics and enough mrarthin runners always so athletic.

Enough fashion icons with their tapered pants and collared shirts,

enough fashion model, beauty queens, those always drunken flirts,

enough burboun drinkers who always forget to use their blinkers,

enough barrel chested players, those long ago varsity lettermen,

enough big house owners who go around married to their closet stoners.

No peak will ever be high enough and no valley will ever see their presence at the bottom with all the left over losers who will never be able to do all that they have done,

where the sun goes for days and nothing brings it out again or relieves the constant strain of not living up to the ways and means htat their examples set,

Enough of all of them!

They forget that I was there the whole time they were and I saw everything they saw over anfd over again and that I was always the one who saw it for what it was.

(I have no interest in unblemished heroes – those who were never real and who never let us down.)

Enough of trying to prove myself, do you ever get tired of trying ot run that fast all the time?

Enough of trying to cram more and more into tight pants, don’t they weigh you down on that constant uphill climb?

Enough of the perfect life, enough of the perfect portraits and the total lack of strife.

Doesn’t that burboun sting your tongue? – Does that cigar really taste that good or is that just a song that you have already sung?

If you are lucky in the end you will maintain your dignity.

If you are lucky you can find a way to let others help you bear some of the burden.

If you are lucky in the end you can rely on your faith and remember what awaits.

(just be sure to remind eveyone how big your house is.)

“Qui totum vult totem perdit”

You who have everything has to have even more, there has to be something left in the bottle to fill the remaining space in the cup, enormous blessings already poured.

You who have so much,

more than you will ever need,

always piling up more and more,

that bottomless consumer creed.

You who have already gone further than most will ever dream still have to stand out front polishing those chrome fenders to an unending gleam.

“Quid totum vult totum perdit”

You with the prestigiosyu job all young and priveledged,

owner of all these commendations, words from the higher ups,

sharing drinks and conversations and your lips to those silver cups.

you who I remember as young and unfocused, trying hard to be somebody, always a follower but then again, never bowing down to anyone.

“Poi s’ascase nel fuco chegli affina”

Then you wait and consider all that has come to pass, and when it comes to pass you to will pass – just as he did, alone and almost without his dignity.

What good will all you have done then do then?

(about the same it did for him – still gone and unable to remember anything or even what it was he had.)

And then there is me, who in his heart of hearts, knows he has more than I ever dreamed I would,

who has had enough of shallow relationships with unattainable people and cant stand the thought of another party of puffery where they all sit around and talk about their new cars or their gross income.

All those season ticket holders and enough of the Ivy League crew and their fancy western homes that have their parties with their tuxedos and all their best freind guests.

(Qui totum vult totem perdit)

T.S. Deary – P.A.F.M.

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